That Brightly Dressed Man Has Ruined the Sanctity of the Super Bowl

"Oh crap...one of my high heels is caught in the turf."

Morality watchdogs have found another target for their outrage in the Super Bowl halftime show performed last weekend by Prince. Apparently, more than a few people have taken umbrage with Prince's silhouetted guitar solo during "Purple Rain," saying that his shadowed instrument (hee hee) is a blatant phallic symbol.

My response..."Yeah...and?"

"No, no Doc, the Cialis is working just fine,
I just have a question about this growth underneath my penis."

Listen, it's entirely possible that the whole thing was unintentional and this was just another case of something looking sexual when it wasn't meant to be. On the other hand, we're dealing with Prince here. I'm guessing he probably knew what he was doing. And if he did do this on purpose, should we be surprised?

This just in...Prince does something sexually provocative.
In other news, the sky is blue.

Prince is a phenomenal musician. Sure he's a little weird, but if you're looking for some high energy music to keep a crowd interested during halftime, he's a pretty good choice. But the guy just oozes sex. He performed five songs during the halftime show, and three of them were covers. Why? Because all of his songs are about fucking!! You know what you're getting into when you hire Prince. Fun, sexy music, and a 50-50 chance of seeing simulated sex acts on stage. If that's not what you're into, then don't hire Prince. A "shadow penis" is so low on the scale of things The Artist could have pulled out (hee hee) that CBS, the NFL, and every morally righteous whack-a-doo out there should thank their lucky stars.